Home Again, Home Again, Jiggity Jig

I can honestly say it wasn't the trip I intended to take, but it ended up being the trip that was supposed to happen.

I thought my time would be dominated by the matriarchal hierarchy, but really I only saw them once at Ginny's celebration. Even then, I felt a bit of the cold shoulder. I suppose it wasn't intended; I get a little oversensitive when hormonal and grieving. However, it did shake me a bit when my Mom and I would try to check in daily and see what the plans were with my aunts and cousins only to find that it wasn't to get together. Odd, odd, odd.

I spent a lot of time with Mom. That was the healing part. We visited our old haunts for lunch, shopped a bit, and of course reminisced about Ginny. I also got to spend quite a bit of time with my brother and his fiance. They really made it a point to hang out as there won't be any time to do this when the nuptials take place later this month. There were some wonderful bright spots of my time there: 4th of July, lunch and a movie with Dad and Mom, playing hearts one evening, and grilling steak for Sunday dinner.

Most of the time I felt stunned by the lack of interaction from such a tight knit group. Perhaps its because we're all getting older and have families of our own? Perhaps it was just too painful to get together without Ginny?

The celebration went extremely well...extremely drunk, but extremely well. Early on (thank God) by in-laws came by, which touched my heart that they would take the time. The event was catered and several family friends showed. Somewhere mid-party, my cousins had organized a gin martini toast. It ended up just being shots of Bombay gin with 4th of July tinsel toothpicks spearing Spanish olives in cordial glasses. The waiters passed them out and my cousin gave a quick speech. It was exactly what she would have wanted.

My Dad's side of the family is infamous for their abrupt departures at family parties, although most are getting better at this now that its just the siblings. My father is the main exception to this. He dined and dashed somewhere around 7:00. He offered to take us, but we all declined and he cited needing to take care of the dogs. While I kept switching from wine to beer to gin to wine again (just like everyone) I was extremely grateful when my soon to be sister in law drove us home. She and I went on a taco run for the family although I ate more than my share. I also drank a ton of water. I remember my brother sharing a story about organic vodka to which my mom sarcastically replied, "Gee, that's important when you are poisoning yourself."

The party was wonderful as I got to reconnect with my cousins. All of them showed up with the exception of one who couldn't find a flight with a reasonable lay over from Hawaii. She has a two year old. My aunts were all business and there wasn't much connecting at all.

I find it odd that I came home one week after Ginny died. It feels like its been a month. I missed J a ton and am happy to be back where its humid, green, and the air is clean. The California forest fires have done a number on SLC valley thus far. I can't believe I'll be making that 5+ hour flight again out West in just a few short weeks...need to buy that plane ticket...